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TOGETHER: Ten building block for a Successful Relationship

TOGETHER: Ten Building Blocks for a Successful Relationship

About the Book

To a large extent, the quality of the relationships in our lives determines the quality of our lives. We've all noticed that when the most important relationships in our lives are harmonious and fulfilling our lives and our worlds are more balanced and we are happier and more productive. But if just one of those relationships is broken, if it is filled with anger, jealousy, resentment or recrimination, there is enough toxicity there to bring misery to just about every other arena of life. Research by Julianne Holt-Lunstad, PhD and her colleagues at Brigham Young University demonstrates that the quality of our relationships even determines how long we will live! They collected data on every aspect of the lives of thousands of middle aged people, waited for seven years to see who had survived, then analyzed the top 10 factors that most reduced their chances of dying during that period. The most important factor was the number of people an individual interacts with on a regular basis, and the second most important was the quality of the individual's closest relationships. These two factors proved more determinative of longevity than even those most often assumed to affect longevity including, but not limited to, diet, exercise, stopping smoking, weight, cholesterol and blood pressure. 


These Ten Building Blocks for Successful Relationships seem to me the most non-negotiable characteristics, attributes or traits of the most successful relationships. When joined together to form a foundation they are, I believe, highly predictive of a rewarding, productive and happy relationship. They are not meant to be exhaustive. You will be able to think of others not mentioned here. Neither are they a test to see if you get to stay in your relationship! They are not magical and do not guarantee a blissful relationship even if you accomplish them all. But they are a way for each of us to evaluate and improve the most significant relationships in our lives.

About the Author

Rev. Ken Martin has a lifetime of experience as a pastor, professor and MCC Elder, responsible for the growth and health of churches throughout the U.S. and Asia. He has conducted retreats and seminars in 41 states and 11 countries. He understands the power of building and maintaining true relationships, personal and spiritual. Ken has dedicated his life to sharing what he has learned about maintaining and strengthening relationships that are at the heart of a life well-lived.

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